“Minorities earn less than white people because they don’t work as hard and have less initiative. We have a high percentage of blacks in prison, and that’s tragic, but are they in prison just because they are black or because they don’t want to study as hard in school? I’ve taught school, and I saw a lot of people of color who didn’t study hard because they said the government would take care of them.”
Once upon a time, someone thought that the civil rights movement managed to get rid of blatant racism from our governments. Clearly they were wrong. I find it interesting how the world is ‘apparently’ getting more progressive, and yet the so-called free world is suddenly full of prominent people who seem to believe that they’re living in 1321 and thus can get away with blatant examples of racism and homophobia.
Let me give you a number of examples;
Yesterday Donald Trump referred to the Chinese people as a people that is ‘ripping off our country [i.e. the US]’ and that ‘China is taking our jobs’. In my world statements like these reek of racism.
5,6% of everyone who voted in the last Swedish election supported a party that has outspoken racist policies.
The French government has banned the use of veils, thereby making Islamophobia state law.
20.1% of the Finns supported a racist party in the recent elections.
The new Hungarian constitution made it impossible for gay people to marry, and furthermore states that sexism and ageism don’t constitute real forms of discrimination.
“There’s this issue you’re not allowed to discuss: that women are needy. Men can go for longer, more happily, without women. That’s the truth. We don’t, as little boys, play at being married - we try to avoid it for as long as possible. Meanwhile women are out there hunting for husbands. The world is vastly counted in favour of men at every level - except if you live in a civilised country and you’re sort of educated and middle-class, because then you’re almost certainly junior in your relationship and in a state of permanent, crippled apology. Your preferences are routinely mocked. There’s a huge, unfortunate lack of respect for anything male.”
Do the reverse sexism mambo! What an heterosexist douchefuck.
Maybe your preferences are routinely mocked because they’re mockable and stupid. And maybe this only happens to men who have 10-year-old tastes at 30. Kind of the way Steve from Coupling has that thing with lesbians, which is completely mockable. Not because it’s silly for men to get off on faux-lesbian porn, but because his obsession with it is at the level of a pre-pubescent boy. When you spread your ID all over television, dude, don’t fucking whine when the world points and laughs.
“Society has a problem with female nudity when it is not … ”—Badu pauses to get her words together; she wants this point to be very clear—“… when it is not packaged for the consumption of male entertainment. Then it becomes confusing.”
Being an asshole doesn’t make you sophisticated, edgy, a courageous warrior against the oppression of political correctness, or a truth-teller. It makes you an asshole.
If the harder of two options is to keep your mouth shut and refrain from making a comment or joke that perpetuates racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, rape culture… that is far more courageous, and innovative, than opening your mouth and making said comment. And that makes you not an asshole, or at least not as much of one.
Arguing that intolerance should not be tolerated is not, in fact, a paradox. Saying “But if you say ‘don’t tolerate intolerance,’ that makes you intolerant too, and that’s hypocritical!” doesn’t make you some kind of intellectual giant. It makes you an asshole who would rather mess around with seeming “conundrums” instead of thinking about things like free choice, bodily autonomy, basic human rights, and the limits of religiously-imposed morality in a secular state.
If you are yourself a girl or woman, hating on other women is not some novel, transgressive or subversive act. Women have actively participating in upholding misogyny for thousands of years. If you want to be novel and subversive, try supporting your fellow women.
Becoming an ally to marginalized groups will not turn you into a saint. It will, hopefully, make you less of an asshole.
Recognizing people’s basic rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness should not be a paradigm-shifting exertion of mental effort. Angels will not come down from heaven with trumpets, and deprivileged groups will not come to you with offerings of cookies. Just recognize that people have the right to live freely and happily, and do what you can to help them. Not because you get something out of it, but because it’s the decent-non-asshole thing to do.
Bolded for emphasis.
Yes, the first one is exactly what i want to say 90% of the time.
Syeeda Hussaini has suffered from neck pain the past few years, to the extent that it’s difficult for her to drive and get a good night’s rest.
So on a recent weekend, she, her husband, and their three kids loaded up the car and drove less than a mile to Mattress Firm. Her husband, Mohammad, encouraged her to lie on different beds to see which one felt best.
She said the store manager approached, but oddly didn’t want to help. He told the family that he wouldn’t sell them a mattress for security reasons, she said.
Hussaini, 27, who is Muslim, covers all but her hands, feet and eyes in public to show respect for femininity and her religion. She said the manager told her she needed to show her face for service. Mohammad, a pathology resident at Barnes-Jewish Hospital, tried to explain that his wife dressed this way to be modest, much like Catholic nuns. But the manager stomped off, they say.
Hussaini wrote a letter to a regional representative of the company after the March 12 visit to the store. An official at Mattress Firm headquarters in Houston said the company “has a zero tolerance policy on racial and religious profiling.” Spokeswoman Sunni Goodman would not comment specifically about the manager, but she confirmed the encounter happened.
"As soon as we were informed of the incident, we took appropriate action to address the situation," she said.
The manager no longer works for Mattress Firm.
I want to know why the manager thought he could get away with something like that. Did he think the corporate office would be okay with that display of bigotry? Would they have been if the media didn’t get involved?
She argues that there are five main types of racism, each equally as detrimental as the next:
Aware/Blatant Racism: Outright racists that, without apology or confusion, tell people of color, that because of their color, they “don’t appeal to them.”
Aware/Covert Racism: When racists are being racist but just not saying it. For instance, upon seeing that a potential tenant is Indian, rather than saying it directly, a landlord will pull the apartment “off the market” without providing an explanation.
Unaware/Unintentional Racism: “With the best of intentions, the best of educations, and the greatest generosity of heart, whites, operating on the misinformation fed to them from day one, will behave in ways that are racist, will perpetuate racism by being ‘nice’ the way we’re taught to be nice.”
Unaware/Self-Righteous Racism: “The ‘good white’ racist attempts to shame Blacks into being blacker, scorns Japanese-Americans who don’t speak Japanese, and knows more about the Chicano/a community than the folks who make up the community.”
Internalized Racism: Stereotypes and attitudes of the white hegemonic system are internalized by members of oppressed groups and peoples and taken for truth or inform the ways they think about themselves and others from similar backgrounds or cultures.
Just when you thought lawmakers couldn’t be more sickening, you discover the new lows to which they will stoop for asshattery.
A provision in the new 9/11 health bill may be adding insult to injury for people who fell sick after their service in the aftermath of the 2001 Al Qaeda attacks, The Huffington Post has learned.
The tens of thousands of cops, firefighters, construction workers and others who survived the worst terrorist assault in U.S. history and risked their lives in its wake will soon be informed that their names must be run through the FBI’s terrorism watch list, according to a letter obtained by HuffPost.
Any of the responders who are not compared to the database of suspected terrorists would be barred from getting treatment for the numerous, worsening ailments that the James Zadroga 9/11 Health And Compensation Law was passed to address.
It’s a requirement that was tacked onto the law during the bitter debates over it last year.
The letter from Dr. John Howard, director of the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health, informs medical providers and administrators that they should begin letting patients know before the new program kicks in this July.
“This is absurd,” said Glen Kline, a former NYPD emergency services officer. “It’s silly. It’s stupid. It’s asinine.”
I’m sure my dear readers can come up with even more choice words for What This Is.
“In my conversations at my signings I’ve discovered two things; black people DO read science fiction and fantasy, and more would read it if they knew not only that we were writing it, but that we were the main characters. The biggest disconnect seems to be with major publishers. They don’t acknowledge the potential demand because corporations don’t deal with potential, especially when it comes to the African American community. So what’s a writer/reader to do?”
“You might know him as Yahweh, Allah or God. But on this fact, Jews, Muslims and Christians, the people of the great Abrahamic religions, are agreed: There is only one of Him,” writes Stavrakopoulou in a statement released to the British media. “He is a solitary figure, a single, universal creator, not one God among many … or so we like to believe.”
“After years of research specializing in the history and religion of Israel, however, I have come to a colorful and what could seem, to some, uncomfortable conclusion that God had a wife,” she added.
Stavrakopoulou bases her theory on ancient texts, amulets and figurines unearthed primarily in the ancient Canaanite coastal city called Ugarit, now modern-day Syria. All of these artifacts reveal that Asherah was a powerful fertility goddess.
Asherah’s connection to Yahweh, according to Stavrakopoulou, is spelled out in both the Bible and an 8th century B.C. inscription on pottery found in the Sinai desert at a site called Kuntillet Ajrud.
“The inscription is a petition for a blessing,” she shares. “Crucially, the inscription asks for a blessing from ‘Yahweh and his Asherah.’ Here was evidence that presented Yahweh and Asherah as a divine pair. And now a handful of similar inscriptions have since been found, all of which help to strengthen the case that the God of the Bible once had a wife.”
Also significant, Stavrakopoulou believes, “is the Bible’s admission that the goddess Asherah was worshiped in Yahweh’s Temple in Jerusalem. In the Book of Kings, we’re told that a statue of Asherah was housed in the temple and that female temple personnel wove ritual textiles for her.”
J. Edward Wright, president of both The Arizona Center for Judaic Studies and The Albright Institute for Archaeological Research, told Discovery News that he agrees several Hebrew inscriptions mention “Yahweh and his Asherah.”
“Asherah was not entirely edited out of the Bible by its male editors,” he added. “Traces of her remain, and based on those traces, archaeological evidence and references to her in texts from nations bordering Israel and Judah, we can reconstruct her role in the religions of the Southern Levant.”
This blows my mind. Three of the largest religious traditions in the world have erased the female counterpart of their God. These are the same religions often accused of passing memetic sexism to their adherents- I don’t think this is at all a coincidence.
Kinda surprised this isn’t well known. But then, this is what I studied in college, not what I learned in Sunday School ;) Going to go look up this book…
CNN recently published an article entitled Study: Threat of Muslim-American terrorism in U.S. exaggerated; according to a study released by Duke University and the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, “the terrorist threat posed by radicalized Muslim-Americans has been exaggerated.”
Yet, Americans continue to live in mortal fear of radical Islam, a fear propagated and inflamed by right wing Islamophobes. If one follows the cable news networks, it seems as if all terrorists are Muslims. It has even become axiomatic in some circles to chant: “Not all Muslims are terrorists, but nearly all terrorists are Muslims.” Muslims and their “leftist dhimmi allies” respond feebly, mentioning Waco as the one counter example, unwittingly affirming the belief that “nearly all terrorists are Muslims.”
But perception is not reality. The data simply does not support such a hasty conclusion. On the FBI’s official website, there exists a chronological list of all terrorist attacks committed on U.S. soil from the year 1980 all the way to 2005.
NO. NO. IT’S NOT ABOUT YOU OR YOUR FEE FEES. IT’S ABOUT ENDING FUCKING OPPRESSION.
No one wants you to feel guilty - they want you to feel informed. They want you to feel incensed that others don’t have the same rights and privileges as you, not indignant that someone of a marginalized group had the audacity to say it to you and it made you feel a twinge of badness for one fucking second.
“Not to add yet another sermon, but it’s getting a little difficult to stay sympathetic to Gaga’s divine cause when she casually throws around terms like “retarded.” Last time I checked, the intellectually disabled were born that way, too.”
Last month, the Center for Liberty’s Louise Melling blogged about how street harassment shames and humiliates women, and is underreported because of the stigma attached to it. While that blog was making the editing rounds here at the office, I shared my own story of how I dealt with a particularly obnoxious harasser, and my esteemed colleagues suggested I share it. Since April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, after all, here it is. And there’s gonna be swearing. I’m really sorry in advance (Mom).
I was walking to work last April, listening to a friend’s CD and not thinking of much besides that I was a little late to work, and really ought to hustle to make my train. A dude passed me as I walked, and I didn’t think much of that either.
All of a sudden…WHAM! Dude WALLOPED me on the backside and ran off.
No one saw it happen. But the gentle denizens of the Upper East Side sure knew something happened, because I let out an unholy yell and a good, throaty “FUCK YOU!!” I turned to see the dude hustling away in his blue and tan jacket and tan backpack.
I hesitated a moment. Did that really just happen? What should I do? Just go on with my day? I’m not sure I want to do that. And I’m pretty sure that if I just let this go, and act like it’s no big deal, or it was “just a smack on the ass,” I’m gonna feel pretty rotten about it for a long time to come. And my butt was really sore. He really went for it.
So I ran after the dude.
It’s possible this guy was crazy. This was something I needed to determine, and also I wanted to get a description, since by this point I had decided that if I was going to be late to work pursuing this mofo, I was damn well gonna call the police. I caught up to him as he was going into the Citibank.
“Hey asshole!” He looked up. He was about 20. Clean-cut. Like he was on his way to school. He did not look crazy. I think he was surprised. I think he figured the five-foot-tall redhead in the sundress and Mary Janes would have just said “Oh my stars!” and scampered away. He does not know this five-foot-tall redhead.
“You think that shit is funny? You like hitting women, huh? You think that’s the correct way to act? Whatsamatterwityou?” All of a sudden, I was Joe Pesci. I swear a lot when I’m nervous. It’s a terrible habit. Perhaps you’ve caught on.
“Ma’am I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You know goddamn well what I’m talking about. YOU DON’T HIT WOMEN, ASSHOLE.” At this point I was screaming into the bank. The whole lobby was looking at me.
Dude got in my face. And this is where it gets kind of hilarious. “How dare you disrespect me in public?” he said. Oh. My. God. He. Did. Not. “I mean, call the police or something, but don’t embarrass me like that. Fuck you.”
It was now clear I was not necessarily dealing with a lunatic. But I was dealing with a moron.
“Good idea, buddy. I WILL call the police.” I called 911 and told them about the incident and the coordinates.
While I was on the phone he got in my face again. “Fuck you, bitch.” Me: “Fuck ME? Fuck YOU!!!… Me (to operator: “I’m sorry, ma’am it’s just he’s antagonizing me.” Him: “You calling the police?” Me: “Goddamn right I am.” Him: “Fine. Fuck the police. Fuck you.” Me: “Tell ‘em so yourself!”
He started walking away after that. The 911 lady advised me to stay put. Good call. I figured I had enough of him without backup. The police came a few minutes later, and I told them the story. I told them I knew they dealt with bigger things than this. But if it doesn’t get reported, it will keep happening. And maybe we can scare this dude enough that that will be one less guy hitting women in the street. The cops had me ride around in the car with them to see if we could find them. (Incidentally, those squad cars? Absolutely no legroom to speak of. In case you ever need extra incentive to not get arrested. Not comfy.)
We couldn’t find him, but the cops (there were four of them by the end of this) took my statement and contact info. They commended me on my description. Which is good, as that validates a lot of Law and Order viewing.
I’m realistic. I knew they were never going to arrest this guy. But here’s the thing, and the point to this whole long, profane story. I know there are a lot of people who think it wasn’t that big a deal. But the truth of the matter is, what this guy did was sexual assault. “Forcible touching and harassment,” if you want to get specific.
Sexual assault doesn’t always necessarily mean something as horrible as rape. And too often street harassment is unreported, and douchebags like this think they can get away with it because the girl is gonna be too embarrassed or too meek to do anything about it. Or they think it’s “just a slap on the ass.” And that’s not right, you guys. I don’t know how other women feel about their posteriors, but you don’t very well get to smack the hell out of it willy-nilly because you feel entitled to do so. There will be repercussions.
To the NYPD’s credit, they did follow up, and the detective told me that if I really wanted to press charges, she would help me do that, even if it meant looking through a lot of surveillance tape and looking at lineups and all that stuff. I opted not to, figuring that they had this guy’s description, and if he did it again, he’d be in a lot of trouble. But something tells me he’s not going to. I think I scared him. Or as the detective said, “So you ran up and confronted him and screamed at him in a bank.”
I know what happened to me could have been a lot, lot worse. But someone doesn’t have to be raped to be humiliated, violated and hurt. Sometimes, all it takes is a smack on the ass.
Awesome. “How dare you disrespect me in public” indeed. WTF.
One Friday afternoon I was talking to school, wearing the baju kurung (quote unquote the more modest school uniform option). A old man on a motorbike puttered up a little behind me and reached to squeeze my ass. Since it WAS a baju kurung, I couldn’t run after him (and I wished I had, because he was on one of those cheapo Boon Siew motorbikes) but I yelled “fuck you” after him.
I get so angry when folks accuse women of wearing sexy clothing or doing something to attract a man’s attention and sexual harassment. No, assholes, we get sexually harassed simply by existing as women. We are raped and harassed even while wearing perfectly modest clothing that reveals nothing. We are humiliated even while we’re doing something as mundane as walking to school.
I’ve mentioned before that a few years ago I made the decision to confront men on the street who verbally harassed other women or myself. I actually don’t get street comments so much, but I see it happen to other women All. The. Time. (I live in NYC, just like the OP.)
Some men respond to my chastisement with surprise, but most respond with anger and defensiveness. Like, how dare I get in their business and call attention to them. It is a private matter, them talking to women they don’t know on the streets in completely inappropriate ways.
It takes a lot of spoons to confront harassers in this way, and I don’t always have enough at a given moment to do it. Sometimes I’m on my way to work, or rushing elsewhere, or tired, or in an area where, if said guy decided to act in a dangerous manner, there is little hope of backup or even witnesses. And some days I’m just damn tired.
But I try to do what I can because I truly think that confrontation sows a small seed of hesitation. That ass-smacking asshole is going to pause before acting impulsively at least the first few times the thought comes into his head. And if he does do it again, I hope that if the woman on the other end of his attentions doesn’t have the spoons to chase him down and scream at him again, someone around her will.
“Mr. Smith, a large sum of money was taken out of your wallet by a friend while it was in your house on the night of 7th January?”
“Did you struggle with your friend?”
“I was in shock, I never thought he would steal from me. And I thought I might get hurt – if he was willing to steal from me, he might well be willing to hurt me.”
“Then you made a conscious decision to let him take the money rather than to resist?”
“Did you scream? Cry out?”
“No. I was afraid.”
“I see. Have you ever been robbed before?”
“Have you ever given money away?”
“Yes, of course–”
“And did you do so willingly?”
“What are you getting at?”
“Well, let’s put it like this, Mr. Smith. You’ve given away money in the past–in fact, you have quite a reputation for philanthropy. How can we be sure that the money was taken from you against your will?”
“Listen, if I wanted–”
“You’ve given this friend money in the past?”
“Yes, but I don’t see what that’s got to do with anything. I’d told him before I didn’t want to give him any more money-”
“Never mind. What time did this alleged theft take place, Mr. Smith?”
“About 11 p.m.”
“You were alone with your friend in the house at 11pm? Why?”
“Yes. I’d invited him round for dinner. He was a friend.”
“Dinner? And did you have a few drinks with dinner? A bottle of wine, some beers…”
“Yes, we had some wine – why does that matter?”
“So you’d been drinking. Are you sure you didn’t tell him he could take the money? You know, maybe you were feeling sorry for him, feeling bad about telling him you weren’t going to lend him money any more… Are you sure you didn’t give him one last bundle of cash, out of sympathy, but maybe you’re feeling bad about it today?”
“Maybe you’d had a few too many and it’s all a bit hazy? Are you sure you didn’t tell him he could have the money, but you can’t remember it?”
“No! He stole it from me-”
“What were you wearing at the time, Mr. Smith?”
“Let’s see. A suit. Yes, a suit.”
“An expensive suit?”
“In other words, Mr. Smith, you were alone and drunk late at night with someone you had previously given money to in a suit that practically advertised the fact that you had money, isn’t that so?”
“Where was your wallet at the time of the theft?”
“It was on the table.”
“Right out in the open, huh? Is it really surprising he got the wrong idea? I mean, if we didn’t know better, Mr. Smith, we might even think you were asking for this to happen, mightn’t we?”
“Look, can’t we talk about the past history of the guy who did this to me?”
“I’m afraid not, Mr. Smith. I don’t think you would want to violate his rights, now, would you?”
These are the only two soap operas I ever watched. I remember exactly how I started watching them. The summer I was 11, having suffered through a slew of terrible summer day camps and other horrors, I convinced my mother to let me stay with my grandmother during the day.
I didn’t have many friends in that neighborhood at the time. And children’s television being what it was before Nickelodeon became useful (How many fucking hours can you play Pinwheel, channel??), I resorted to mindlessly flipping channels looking for anything resembling a cartoon on rainy days.
That’s when I stumbled upon a show that involved some people on an island, one of whom was pretending to be a gangster to fool another gangster who was in love with the guy’s sister or cousin or something who was in love with some hot dude named Jake.
Oh, One Life To Live, you had me from hello.
The morning kids shows trailed off at 1:30, yet OLTL didn’t start until 2. That’s how I got in the habit of watching All My Children, too. And for many years onward, I kept up with all those crazy white people and smattering of slightly less crazy people of color until college and my lack of VCR ended it all.
I’ve poked my head in a few times over the years. Same old stuff, different cast (except Susan Lucci and Erika Slezak). Things got crazy over the years, but not as crazy as they did back in the day. Like the time Viki Buchanan spent several months in the days of the old west, having traveled back in time. No, I am not kidding.
Even though I haven’t watched in years, it still pains me in my heart that these shows are going away. That this kind of storytelling is going away. (I have a long post about that, too, which I’ll write someday.)
Let’s celebrate the end by talking about OLTL and AMC storylines and characters. The ones you loved, the ones that drove you insane, the ones that made no damn sense, anything at all.